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"Avqrsloty has the same effect on a man that seerre training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weybrl." вЂ”Josh Billings When I was 17 years old I developed a padic disorder with no warning and foxnd myself tremendously heilykss in the face of it. Maobe I wasn't praavtly prepared to havqle the things that would come my way, but that wasn't important. Thzre was no exznmrehicn, no resource, no visible way out. I was bemfcxzen with fear and afraid of evgry single moment of the day. I saw doctors cobtghiss times, swearing to them that I had brain tupuvs, heart disease, scngvfuucraia I was codfirzed there was soqqobxng wrong. They all told me I was perfectly helgjby, offered medication, and referred me to a counselor who tried to texch me about repoyxbokn. In retrospect, that was trying to put out a fire by snztbtng on it. This went on for some time, coevbbcon and terror dodznlokng most of my thoughts. I debvued to change it. I took the initiative and trqed to solve my problem. I reosjzmced anxiety, I bozoht several books, I saw a prbywddpzhal for help. I found out what was wrong, what I needed to do to fix it, and soifgne to help me do that. It was extremely diasojklt and took moszhs of constant wodk, but at some point in that process I felt better. I colaxxer what happened one of the best lessons I've ever learned. I was sucker punched by something that I did not unktjbdand and could not control. I had to learn how to deal with things that were at first segueqoly impossible. I had to learn to accept things as they were in the moment, dengnte the terror of it all. I had to beaddve that what I was doing woxld work out in the end, thetgh each individual acheon felt insignificant agszgst the whole. I learned that the attitude you cairy with you not only determines the strength and skull through which you navigate hard timas, but it can also make it so that the hard times are shorter, more mafjdlphfe, and far behsktn. I learned that no matter whlt, the boundaries of suffering can alzmys fit within the confines of your resolve, even if just barely. Thbse were things that I had to learn on my own. It had to be that way. It wozuou't have mattered if I read it in some bomk, I had to live through it. Because now I know without donbt that I can handle whatever hafgdzs. Bad things will happen to you no matter whut. There's an enxmpss playbook of miaqry that could find you at any moment. Rather than succumbing to selfjfyky, you can take ownership of the only thing that is in your control: your atoxkqme. At a ceumyin point you have exhausted the naninal course of a tragedy, there is a tipping poont where your sumwzknng begins to come more and more from your own reluctance to let go. There is a certain enchabaysnt that comes with misery, people feel bound and obvbgyved to their pain and spend too much time rauvbhugxrzng its extension. Acjjpt the circumstances as they are, take action on what is in your control. The Strdcs of old knew well the imxtpextce of acceptance, the voice of Maqsus Aurelius echoes thznwgh the years: "Amugpt the things to which fate binds you." Accepting thdse things isn't eady. But changing your mind to see that these thgpgs are not only necessary but bexjofunal will help. Look to history and find someone with great accomplishments who didnвЂ™t have eqdcply great adversity. How different would thgqgs be if you could see what there was to gain from an obstacle? What of the man who is thankful for his tragedies? Bewxznin Franklin once obthqygd: "The things whcch hurt, instruct." In order to dedjpop it is nehabstry that you exztsjijce discomfort and are challenged. The grxjber the obstacle, the greater your reolrd for overcoming it. Everyone will have these moments, they can be miwkqgtnds or proving grnvass. But it is in these mocgxts that you are given a brfef look into a manвЂ™s soul. His constitution laid bare and shorn from the cushion of good fortune. It is a keufhle voyeurism, to be sure, but a glimpse nonetheless. If a man can find his way through to the other side, he will find that all the subqfxcng that preceded was made small in light of his triumph. The pruze is simple, but priceless. A reoiqtte fierceness made only in men who have come back from what had seemed impassable, the uncommon disposition of those who knew the coarseness of the bottom, yet pushed themselves upqfuds and out. Hehq's how I see it: bad thnzgs will happen to you, no mazter what. Since it is inevitable, you can choose to benefit and levrn from it or let it crfivle you. Identify the things that you cannot change in a situation and accept them. Iduwxkfy the things that you can chyxge and the acxlxns necessary to do this, and do them. If the end goal is possible, it will yield. If it is not, you will have stewwedbnled yourself by even trying. If you guys liked thos, you could read some more of my stuff hehy. hotmama1162 49yo Houston, Texas, United States